Failure, Disappointment, and Grace

Yesterday was the day Christians celebrated Christ rising from the dead, demonstrating the victory he has over death and hell.  That victory he shares with everyone who believes in Him.  Victory that is real and that is experienced by so many.  A victory that I didn’t experience yesterday.  See, what happened was I had the privilege of leading the church in singing worship songs, songs that told the story of the risen Lord and his triumph over sin and death.  The problem was, I made some mistakes that threw off the flow of singing, not coming in on time, skipping a line.  I thought afterward, something threw me off.  Was it the extra loud stage volume?  Not enough monitor?  Not enough practice?  Too many new songs?  If you know me, I’m typically prepared, calm, collected.  I take things as they come and find contentment in it all.  Zen master Chen.  I go with the flow.  I let things flow.  But this time, no flow.  This time, failure and disappointment started to set in.  I couldn’t help but feel I’ve let everyone down.  The worship team, the congregation, even God.  Even God?  Can God be disappointed?  I believe so, but there is something greater, something that overcomes the failures and disappointments that we experience – grace.

 Earlier that day, Daniel taught a lesson on John 21.  It’s the story of the disciples going back fishing.  Jesus had died on the cross and had already risen.  He had told them earlier that they would no longer be fishermen, but fisher of men.  You would think by now they would have started their mission of fulfilling their purpose of preaching the good news to the world.  Oh, and by the way, Jesus had already appeared to them twice (v.14) after he was raised from the dead.  They already saw him alive again after he died!  Twice!  Instead of passionately going out and changing the world, Simon Peter says, “I’m going out to fish.”  And the disciples responded, “We’ll go with you.”  So they went out and got into the boat, but that night they caught nothing.  Utter failure.  Not fulfilling the mission.  Not catching anything.

Here is when grace, the unmerited favor of God, dawns on the scene.  Early the next morning, Jesus stood on the shore, but the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.

   He called out to them, “Friends, haven’t you any fish?”
  “No,” they answered.
He said, “Throw your net on the right side of the boat and you will find some.”  When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish (John 21:4-6).  Jesus reenacts his first personal miracle with the disciples.  Excited, they met Jesus on the shore, where a breakfast of fish and bread was already prepared for them.  I like how Jesus tells them, "Bring some of the fish you have just caught (v.10)."  He could have said, "Bring me the fish that I just miraculously gave to you."  Our Lord is so tender and gracious.  He cares intimately about our humanity.  He is God, but not a God that is aloof.  It was when God showed up that their joy was restored.  It was here where Jesus restores Peter and redirects him to feed Jesus’ sheep and follow Him.

Without grace, the disciples would have been left with no fish.  The message of hope and reconciliation would have never spread.  We would all be left to wallow in our failures and disappointments.  Our only destiny would be to die in our sins.  We would only be looking forward to a sunless dark morning.  Joy and peace would only be elusive ideals never to be fully grasped.  But that’s not how the story ends.  The Lord is risen and a new day has dawned.  The message of hope and reconciliation is alive and life’s failures and disappointments are only but a vapor.  The journey across the valley of the shadow of death is temporary and the destiny of those in Christ is not death, but eternal life.  God has not left us abandoned, but has given us much grace, and is faithful to give us more.  “You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:11)